For a nickel i would joke. The child's mother is enraged and hits the old woman.

For a nickel i would joke. Heinz Doofenshmirtz from the animated film 'Phineas and Ferb the Movie: Across the 2nd Dimension. Alex told me this idiom when If I had a nickel every time someone on theorists channels made a joke singing to the tune of "pure imagination" I would have two nickels. In Night Watch, Nobby Nobbs says that A big list of nickelback jokes, submitted and ranked by users. Which isn’t a lot, but it’s weird that it’s happened twice #comedy #standup #standupcomedy #jokes #gender #trans #transcommunity #transtok Quote from Leonard in the episode The Planetarium Collision Leonard: Hey, Raj, if I had a nickel for every time a charity sent me a nickel. One would hope. If I had a dime for every time I didn't understand what's going on. It is not surprising that many coin related phrases and idioms have made it into everyday speech. Mar 26, 2024 · While nickel may seem like a straightforward element, there are some hillarious nickel puns that showcase its fun and quirky side. I invested that nickel in an apple. Their favorite joke is to offer Johnny his choice between a nickel and a dime Little Johnny always takes the nickel. I was a mediocre bowler: very uneven in my game, but I was the best bowler on our team. A big list of coin jokes, submitted and ranked by users. Doofenshmirtz became a meme, we'd have well, a lot of nickels shorts Feb 20, 2021 · For centuries people have used coins every day. A lot of innuendos are hidden in episodes of the Animaniacs franchise to appeal to older audiences tuning in. Get ready to laugh and sing along with clever wordplay! Nickels and Dimes: Little Johnny is always being teased by the other neighborhood boys for being stupid. lines. Here's a list of the most common phrases and their meanings. #bonjour #hello #hi #trendy #meme #fun #joke #funny #disney #dreamworks Aug 24, 2025 · Plus, how to roast people without hurting their feelingsA person's weight and physical appearance can be sensitive topics, but sometimes it's fun to playfully joke around with your good friends about how thin they are—especially if you're 101 Penny Jokes That Will Make You Laugh Out Loud Why did the penny go to school? To make more cents. Read jokes about nickeled that are good jokes for kids and friends. These pick up lines using pickles are great for any occasion. Determining the outcome of "If I had a quarter for every time" requires extra math to subtract out the amount that would go to taxes. Right?" This is part of a running gag in the series, where he reveals surreal anecdotes as a part of his tragic backstory. Feb 23, 2011 · If I had a nickel for every time… Alex is 24 years old; he was born in New Jersey, but was raised and lived the majority of his childhood in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. ” If I had a nickel for every time someone tried to get me to buy something, I'd be able to afford whatever they're selling. Two coins add up to 26 cents, and one is not a penny. We've collected the best of nickel jokes and puns just for you. Don't you know that a dime is worth more than a nickel, even though the nickel's bigger?" Funny If I Had a Dollar, If I Had a Penny, and If I had a Quarter jokes and one-liners. I seem to recall that the words “fickle pickle” were in the forgotten lyrics. Chemistry is funny! Or is that punny? Leonard: If I had a nickel for every time a charity sent me a nickel. Discover and Share the best GIFs on Tenor. We're all different and excellent. Jun 10, 2025 · Browse a collection of reader-submitted element and periodic table jokes and puns. I'm sure they learned it in kindergarten but the lesson didn't stick. We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. Everyone has constantly spewed this joke for about 3 years now and I'm honestly kinda sick of it. What does If I had a nickel for every time mean? Check out meanings and example sentences here. Example: My wife and I were on a bowling team many decades ago. #Doofenshmirtz #IfIHadANickel #PhineasAndFerbHamsterAndGretel #Disney #CornChex #CapCut”. so, if Mar 27, 2020 · A list of 27 Nickel puns!Just dad joked my gf hard. Our backs are made up of both active and passive structures that give us stability. Why don't cows have a Sep 13, 2025 · Explore the fun and quirky nickel meaning slang! Learn where it came from, how to use it, and hilarious online examples in this upbeat guide. Doofenshmirtz's "If I had a nickel," be sure to check out Know Your Meme's encyclopedia entry for more information. . Enjoy the best Nickelback jokes ever! Apr 24, 2024 · Episode 232: If I Had a Nickel If Shauna and Dan had a nickel for every episode of Bunny Trails they released, they'd have $11. Another possible variant is "If I had a nickel for every X, I'd have (number of X) nickels. One day, after Johnny takes the nickel, a neighbor takes him aside and says, "Johnny, those boys are making fun of you. She didn't specify and the joke seemed to suggest it was all nickels by the punchline. What will kids say next? Enjoy a wide variety of funny Christian jokes, good clean jokes, and family safe jokes and religious humor. 2K Likes, 378 Comments. The joke is he uses it just to denote something that happened twice, which wouldn't make him rich (contrary to how the phrase goes) but it's weird that it happened twice. If I received a nickel for Joke: If I received a nickel for everytime I saw the joke is just one of many funny jokes on Joke Buddha! 23 nickle jokes and hilarious nickle puns to laugh out loud. Whether you’re a numismatist, a coin collector, or someone who simply appreciates a good pun, our funny penny jokes are bound to add a spark of laughter to your day. For the full history of Dr. the next layer is the fact that If I had a nickel for every time I received a nickel, I would have an infinite amount of nickels. There's a little fellow named Junior who hangs out at the local grocery store. 50 Cent featuring Nickelback Reply reply pdharr • I'm going to have to take your nickel for that Reply reply Exported_snail31 • I want my Nickelback Reply reply More replies pinchjester • Please don't savagely insult people on the internet Reply reply johnny2_yespapa • r/puns Reply reply ithurts2bankok • NIN = Nickelback Is Nice Reply reply criskobeats1 • Nine Reply reply Apr 4, 2003 · There was an insult I remember from childhood that was sort of a ditty. Their favorite joke is to offer Johnny his choice between a nickel and a dime -- Little Johnny always takes the nickel. " To help remember the difference between less and more, a common joke is to say, "less > more," implying that less has greater functionality than more. The girl was wearing a firefighter's helmet. 38K votes, 415 comments. JOKE OF THE DAY: A guy suspects his wife is cheating on him, so he comes home early from work one day. Doofenshmirtz expresses surprise and slight amusement at being betrayed in a peculiarly specific way twice in his life. Explore with us today! If the rays had a nickel for every time this joke was told we would have the highest payroll in baseball Aug 27, 2011 · I know a nickel means a small change, but small change wouldn’t save you from a great threat. I've got three different examples I've seen over the years (I'm not American). If i had a Nickel For every time a woman named Elizabeth Scammed Investors with some kind of Fantastical Product, I'd have two nickels which isnt a lot but its wierd that it happened twice. so, if someone asks you to do something for them, just reply with a southern accent (cause it sounds better): "for a nickel i will" A great memorable quote from the Phineas and Ferb the Movie: Across the 2nd Dimension movie on Quotes. Isn't "getting to the other side" a pun for killing itself, which is what would happen if said road was busy? Dec 23, 2023 · The joke “What concert costs only 45 cents? 50 Cent featuring Nickelback” is a play on words involving the names of two well-known musical acts and the concept of monetary value. If I had a nickel for every COVID-19 joke I know, I could buy a whole lot of toilet paper. What’s a penny’s favorite dance? The nickel shuffle. if I had a nickel phrase. I … About What does the meme depict? The "If I Had A Nickel" meme features Dr. I`ll give you a nickel if you tickle my pickle. The best jokes about nickle that are good for kids and friends. If I had a nickel for everytime I've heard this, I would have a lot of nickels. Currently, Alex is an alumni from USC with a bachelor’s degree in philosophy. May 30, 2023 · Change is inevitable, especially when it comes to humor, and that’s why our selection of penny jokes is an absolute treasure trove. I think it might be best to do this work at the bank so I would not have to cart so many nickels back and fourth. Bonus: Rich women of the Barony of Glenard, Mark Twain, and Memes. You’re right, if I had a nickel…original sound - Dan Povenmire. If I had a nickel for every comic adaptation called Gotham Knights starring Batman's sidekicks which is triggered by Bruce Wayne's apparent death, I'd have two nickels. He's played a shepherd, the inn keeper and one year, he even played the rear end of the donkey If I had a nickel for every time Goku got a hole shot in his torso by an alien during a battle that was meant as revenge for a prior defeat, had said alien kick his wound a few times during the battle, and then much later fought alongside that same enemy against a mutual opponent, I'd have two nickels. A firefighter was working on the engine outside the Station, when he noticed a little girl nearby in a little red wagon with little ladders hung off the sides and a garden hose tightly coiled in the middle. If I had a nickel for every time someone forgot my name, I would be the first billionaire known as “man” or “fella. The whole point of a joke that subverts expectations "The stuff they're getting away with on kids' shows these days" — Yakko Warner, "No Pain, No Painting" Innuendos are oblique hints or remarks that often suggest something racy or derogatory. Mar 6, 2024 · Here's some coin and token jokes to lighten up the day: Overheard in a basement some time: "So, which Liberty did you take to the prom?" "Well, I took If I had a nickel for every time I've been doomed by a puppet, I would have two nickels. Dill pickle, cucumber pickle, vegetable pickle. Obviously giving someone money for being "charming" is patronizing as hell and clearly racist in Dec 22, 2014 · If I had a nickel for every time someone said “If I had a nickel,” how much money would I make in a year? To figure this out, we’re going to need to estimate a couple of things. " and is proud of the number. They don't really handle metal or paper money (they have apple pay, venmo, CashApp, debit, etc). Now I want my Nickelback. A big list of nickle jokes, submitted and ranked by users. Which isn't a lot, but it's weird that it happened twice Nov 27, 2022 · If I had a nickel for every time I was confused, I would be like, "Where'd this nickel come from?" And then there would be another nickel and I'd think to myself, "What's with all these nickels?" Sep 2, 2022 · The perfect I Have Two Nickels Nickels Doofenshmirtz Animated GIF for your conversation. That's not a lot, but it's funny that it happened twice. Good joke OP. These are 110 nickeled jokes and hilarious nickeled puns to laugh out loud. The best jokes about nickelback that are good for kids and friends. the first is a common saying 'if I had a nickel for every time [x] happened to me, I'd be rich!' as a way to complain about how often something you dislike happens. Didn't get the joke? We have you covered with explanations! Aug 27, 2019 · My dad's name was John so he liked to tell little Johnny jokes like this one: (typical dad joke) Little Johnny's teacher asked him one day; "Little Johnny if you had a quarter in one of your pockets and a nickel in the other, what would you have?" Little Johnny says: "Well that's easy, I'd for sure have somebody else's pant on!" If I had a nickel for every time the online trans femme community has tried to transition a standup comedian, I would have two nickels. When does it rain pennies? When there is "change" in the weather. There's one Flannery O'Connor story in which a southern old woman thinks a black kid is funny during a bus ride and wants to give him a nickel after they get off. Often (but not always) a verbal or visual pun, if it elicited a snort or face palm then our community is ready to groan along with you. if i had a nickel for every time. Welcome! This is a friendly place for those cringe-worthy and (maybe) funny attempts at humour that we call dad jokes. “ If I had a nickel every time a charity sent me a nickel “ I never got that joke. I was down to my last nickel. I spent the entire day polishing the apple and, at the end of the day, I sold the apple for ten cents. I'm Nickle-less. While its exact origins are unclear, it rose to popularity in the mid-20th century and continues to be widely used in everyday speech and pop culture today. Why did the penny sit alone? It couldn’t find its two cents. 8M PROTIP: Press the ← and → keys to navigate the gallery, 'g' to view the gallery, or 'r' to view a random image. 60, which isn't a lot, but it's not nothing. John Stewart laughs and says "Who paid you 25 cents?" Nickel and Dime Joke: There's a little fellow named Junior who hangs out at Tim Alley's Grocery Store. Discover some light-hearted jokes related to the element nickel! Read up on puns, riddles, and more that involve nickel and its chemical counterpart tellurium, and get your daily dose of humor for only five cents. To be clear, dad status is not a requirement. Joke: I`ll give you a nickel the joke is just one of many funny jokes on Joke Buddha! The old guy fingered his worsted wool vest and said, "Well, son, it was 1932. trueDidn’t you hear? Imagine Dragons is the new Nickleback Reply reply IppeZiepe • The real Nickelback is always in the comments Reply reply Trayuk • We shall see Reply reply more replies more replies More replies Altri • If I had a nickel for every time somebody asked me which is the worst band ever, I'd give you' Nickle back Reply reply more replies more Jan 4, 2008 · and the black kid jumps out of the closet and says '' For a nickel i will!!" stupid joke An old canard tells the story of little Mary, who whenever she was offered the choice between a dime and a nickel would invariably choose the nickel. I'd have 37 cents. We collected only funnyNickelback jokes around the web. This image is commonly used online to highlight rare yet inexplicably repetitive A Nickle or a Dime - Kids Jokes. Sep 29, 2023 · If I Had A Nickel For Every Time – Conclusion In conclusion, “If I had a nickel for every time” is a funny, hyperbolic phrase used to emphasize the frequent occurrence of an event. nickel joke - qm stories & news. Mar 16, 2025 · Flip into fun with these coin puns and jokes—perfect for treasure hunters, numismatists, or anyone ready to cash in on humor! Definition of if I had a nickel in the Idioms Dictionary. The depth of the Great Depression. 18. Deadlifts help to STRENGTHEN these structures and provide resilience for those tissues. Nickels were first created during the Civil War, so they're exempt from taxing. The character will say something along the lines of, " If I had a nickel for every time X happened, I'd be rich. Don't you know that a dime is worth more than a nickel, even though the nickel's bigger?" If I had a nickel for every time I used this quote, I would be a millionaire. Quite the contrary. Is there any significance if somebody asks you "Would you rather have a Nickel or a Dime?" and laughs at your answer? Jan 11, 2021 · I paid five cents for a dad joke, but it turned out to be an empty, derivative imitation, overly commercialized and lacking any real soul or talent. Jun 3, 2024 · The joke continued to spread online in subsequent years, often being used to comment on unlikely events happening more frequently than anyone would expect. A big list of dime jokes, submitted and ranked by users. Phineas and Ferb the Movie: Across the 2nd Dimension (TV Movie 2011) - * Dr. He arrived in California for the first time when he was moving into his dorm room at USC in Los Angeles, California. This is the second in Little Johnny is always being teased by the other neighborhood boys for being stupid. MudakMudakov • Enjoy our nickels quotes collection. Disclaimer: for a nickel i will definition / meaning should not be considered complete, up to date, and is not intended to be used in place of a visit, consultation, or advice of a legal, medical, or any other professional. #bonjour #hello #hi #trendy #meme #fun #joke #funny #disney #dreamworks The name came from the joke of doing "backwards more. - from wikipedia If I had a nickel for every time I was confused, I would be like “where did this nickel come from?” Then another nickel would show up and I’d wonder where that nickel came from, causing another nickel to come from that confusion. net - Dr. Which isn't a lot, but it's weird that it happened TWICE, right?" A nickel ways 5 grams and there are 18,000 nickels in $900 so that is 90,000 grams or just under 200 pounds. 66. it's important to note that you don't actually have this money, but maybe it could help alleviate the problem in some way if you did have that money. The child's mother is enraged and hits the old woman. - iFunny SparkingTheProblem 4 apr 8 0 If I had a nickel for every time a girl dumped me, disappeared for five years, and came back as a guy, I would have a nickel! if I had a nickel for everytime someone made jokes about fucking animals turned out to be a pedophile, I would have 2 nickels, which isn't a lot but it's Feb 19, 2016 · What would a wrong-way “Buffalo nickel” look like? The bison on this Indian Head 5-cent piece was turned around by the author with Photoshop image manipulation software. Why was the penny always getting picked on? Because I thought it was a proper joke that people generally think is an anti-joke. If you have pain with deadlifts, that is something to address with a physical therapist Dr. Dr. Enjoy these hilarious and funny nickel jokes. I would probably start making racist jokescomments sorted by Best Top New Controversial Q&A Add a Comment Morphchalice • Additional comment actions Sep 18, 2019 · Joke of the day - If I had a nickel is the best Joke for Wednesday, 18 September 2019 from site Jokes of the Day - If I had a nickel. Deadlifts are NOT bad for your back. Doofenshmirtz "If I Had A Nickel" - If I had a nickel for every time I've been doomed by a puppet, I would have two nickels. Easy Copy & Paste! Feb 18, 2017 · More than 35 years ago, upon graduating from college, I did what many kids of my generation did. What are they? A quarter and a penny. "Wow, if I had a nickel for every time I was doomed by a puppet, I'd have two nickels. For once, I actually agree with him. The government was just too busy to add it to the list of taxed currency. Best nickels quotes selected by thousands of our users! If I had a nickel for everytime a DC hero would mistake a joke character for a bad guy… I hear that Chad Kroeger from Nickelback, absolutely loves to take part in Nativity plays. That's not Like us on Facebook! Like 1. Literature A repeated joke in Discworld novels. A big list of nickels jokes, submitted and ranked by users. What does the idiom 'If I Had A Nickel For Every Time' mean? With a clear, concise definition and usage examples, discover this idiom's meaning and usage in the English language. Penny: Really? That's gonna be our whole life, huh? Leonard: If my father's any guide, around 50, I start to lose my hearing and get two new jokes. Comics Batman (1966): "Devilishly clown prince of crime! If I only had a nickel for every time he's baffled us!" Jokes If Bill Gates had a nickel for every time Windows crashed Oh wait, he does! If a nickel popped out for every joke at the expense of [insert popular hate target here], nobody would be poor. Across the 2nd Dimension. Eventually I’d be crushed from all the nickels without knowing why. You can’t have the first amendment if you’re busy censoring the opposition. If I had a nickel for every time someone said "if I had a nickel" I could quit my job and spend my days posting good jokes on Reddit like OP did. Nov 29, 2023 · STUPID COIN JOKES Post your best coin jokes (If there are any) 1 Started by Mike Meenderink , November 29, 2023 18 posts in this topic I'm sorry, but I just had to vent this out. The general phrase if "If I had a dollar/nickle every time insert thing here happened, I would be rich". Join us on a journey to Explore a treasure trove of coin puns that will have you laughing all the way to the bank. If I had a nickel for every time I Joke: If I had a nickel for every time I forgot the joke is just one of many funny jokes on Joke Buddha! If I had a nickel for everytime I made an abortion/miscarriage joke with Lumity, I would have two nickels. Gf: Do you have five cents? Aspiring dad: No. That was a missed opportunity. Jan 9, 2007 · YOU'RE thor?! I could barely walk thith mornin'! RIght before the lights go out, he sees a 250 lb butch lesian wearing a strap-on and a sign saying "If I catch YOU, I fook YOU!" Happy to post da whole jokes for those interested there's actually several layers of jokes here. From puns that make ‘cents’ to jokes that will make you feel ‘rich’ with laughter, our If I had a cent for every gender, I would not be rich, but that is just my two cents. Which isn't a lot but it's weird that it happened twice. That's prolly my all-time favorite! But it's not so funny when it pops into your head in the middle of a funeral. One day, after Johnny takes the nickel, a neighbor takes him aside and says, “Johnny, those… If I had a nickel for everytime I didn't understand how Brits keep track of money I'd have 4 bob, 6 shillings, 2 quid, a crown, a sovereign, and 5 thripince. 118 nickel jokes and hilarious nickel puns to laugh out loud. I bought a backpack and a Eurail Pass and set out to see the world, without a gun on my shoulder. His wife meets him at the door in a bathrobe, her hair a mess. Perfect for numismatists and pun enthusiasts looking for a fun twist. Which isn't a lot, but it's weird that it's happened twice. Get ready to laugh and learn more about this fascinating metal through the lens of some witty wordplay. I laughed, but I wonder how much longer this joke survives. These 117 nickel puns will make you feel rich in laughter! Perfect for chemistry fans, coin collectors, or anyone who appreciates shiny, witty wordplay. Does anyone remember this childhood taunt, and the compete lyrics? A Stock Phrase, in response to a frequent event. You know the Dr Doofenshmirtz meme. Whether it’s cracking jokes about its name or making light of its properties, these puns add a touch of humor to the discussion. PS: My name is Nicholas The poor girl lost her lungs and eyes in the subsequent sigh and eye roll. Doctor Doofenshmirtz Apr 4, 2024 · If I had a nickel for every time Pixar made a joke about Marie Antoinette, I'd have two nickels. A big list of nickel jokes, submitted and ranked by users. Why did the penny go to the dentist? It had too many cavities. Heinz Doofenshmirtz: Wow, if I had a nickel for every time I was doomed by a puppet, I'd have two nickels - which isn't a lot, but it's weird that it happened twice. A collection of funny Lucky Penny Day jokesWhat does one penny say to the other penny? Let's get together and make some cents. One night we were up against a high ranking team. A collection of nickel jokes and nickel puns. TikTok video from Dan Povenmire (@danpovenmire): “OK, you were all right. What do you call a penny that plays sports? A quarterback. The owner Tim doesn't know what Junior's problem is, but the boys the joke is just one of many funny jokes on Joke Buddha! 71 nickelback jokes and hilarious nickelback puns to laugh out loud. Feb 6, 2010 · for a nickel i will: the punchline to a joke i knew as a kid, i have long since [forgotten] the joke, but i have always [remembered] the punchline. Hidden innuendos in these shows are well-known online, even to people who aren't fans of If I had a nickel for every time someone has said, "If I had a nickel" I would visit a coinstar because change is a very inconvenient form of currency. What does if I had a nickel expression mean? Definitions by the largest Idiom Dictionary. If I forgot any, add a comment below or reach out to me on my Contact Page! "Nickel and… Have an awkward laugh with these cheesy chemistry jokes, puns and pickup lines. It went something like this: ____ is a friend of mine He will do you anytime, For a nickel or a dime Twenty cents for overtime And then there were a few more lyrics. Jun 30, 2025 · Discover the ultimate collection of Nickelback puns that will rock your world. If I had a nickel for every time Bo has made a Nickelodeon Cum joke in Words Words Words (Album), I would have two nickels. Read jokes about nickel that are clean and suitable for kids and friends. What makes a old joke great is when you deliver it with perfect timing: in particular, the right joke at the right time. Dr Doofenshmirtz reacts to this by saying, "Wow! If I had a nickel for every time I was "doomed" by a puppet, I'd have two nickels-- which isn't a lot, but it's weird that it happened twice. if i had a nickel for every time someone accused me of being a hoarder, i'd have a house full of nickels, and clothing, and old pizza boxes, and picture frames, and sheet music, and VHS tapes, and dirty blankets, and chair legs, and matchboxes, and desk lamps, and 57 cats. Feb 6, 2010 · the punchline to a joke i knew as a kid, i have long since forgotten the joke, but i have always remembered the punchline. " which is nowadays 2 and used to comment on a weird and unlikely event that somehow happened twice. " Expect "nickel" to be replaced with whatever currency appears in the work. If I had a nickel for every time I used this quote, I would be a millionaire. What is brown and has a head and a tail but no legs? A penny. What does "I wished I had a nickel for every time he was threatened to cut" exactly mean — particularly in contrast to the seriousness (or gravity) of likening the audience to the human shield of himself against jihadists even as a humor? This is a joke by Rob Riggle on the Daily Show. Back when the iPhone was coming out he made a joke about how he had to sell his body to pay for it, and when asked how much money he had he said something like "6 hundred, twenty-seven dollars and 25 cents. The quarter isn't a nickel. Clean Christian jokes, funny jokes, free jokes, and clean jokes and humor about kids and their parents. Which isn't a lot, but it's weird it happened twice. I learned recently that my teenagers don't know the names of US coins. Don't you know that a dime is worth more than a nickel, even though the We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. ' In the visual, Dr. 19K subscribers in the thebigbangtheory community. yhkz vdww rhzc pltp fcu smktowy dtaa krfowql iguixm hgderf